I am always amazed how some philosophies attract a following and others remain narrow and personal. That record spans human thought from ancient history to ... oh, some guy who happened to say something clever last week.
One could counter Ruiz' agreements with a personal experience that produces a conflicting perspective. Our philosophy cannot be fitted into someone else’s tidy categories … life is not one-size-fits all.
People experience life-altering events that color the remainder of their lives. War, death, disease, service, abuse, travel, education or lack of it, neglect or nurture, affluence and poverty; of such is the multi-prismed filter in which we form our own ideology.
If these agreements (or Robert's) help anyone, that is great. But I see more benefit in developing a deeply held philosophy that works specifically for us alone. It's a hard world out there ... any beliefs that gives one peace is a good.

I just read this book a few weeks ago and found it helpful to put perspective on my life. The questions he asks at the end of the book are particularly helpful in gaining insight. What kind of messengers are the other people in your life? What messages did they deliver to you? How many messages did you agree with and take as your own? If you are delivering someone else's messages whose are you delivering? What kind of messenger am I?
These questions go to discovering your own truth as opposed to someone elses "story" as he calls it. In the end the authenticity is the goal.

The best we can ever hope for as artists is to keep moving forward and do the best we can and let everything else take care of itself. The only thing we have any control over is our desire to work. I have said, in the past, that even the art work we create has a mind of its own and in many cases turns out differently than we planned.
I have grown many gray hairs worrying about sales, galleries, inventory, framing and a host of things that are integral to but peripheral to creating the work. In the end, it is the work that matters and it is this work that will be left behind. When I put my name on my work, it has my endorsement that this work is the best I could do at the time.
All worthy artists have empathy and compassion for others as well as a passion for life otherwise we fill our canvases with mundane emptiness. Being an artist is a double edged sword. We crave attention and need aloneness. We need to paint for money, yet paint for a greater purpose. We want our work to be loved, while creating work that may cause strife. Beauty should be the aim of art, though we paint strident subjects periodically for a cause.
This duplicity of purpose and meaning to being an artist may seem hypocritical to those looking in but it is just this duplicity that gives artists their edge. Artists can see life in ways others can’t. We have the ability and the tools to bring attention to the struggle of others while showing the beauty in things others may overlook.
I admit there may have been times I wished with all my heart to have been born without this intense natural propensity for painting, yet, when I look around and see how art can change someone’s life, how art can improve one’s outlook, how enriched my life has been by the people I have met all because of being an artist, all the strife and struggle and indifference doesn’t seem to matter as much.

I’ve heard of Ruiz’s list. It’s ok. At least I understand what he’s up to. But I much prefer the Genn list. Though longer, it gets at things that matter more. Keep on paddling. I hope to see you out there. Timonium, Maryland

Thank you for your letter, which I read (religiously). It helps me feel connected to other artists and that is inspirational in itself. If you like Don Miguel Ruiz's work, you may also enjoy Pablo Neruda's poetry. The great man was an artist with words.

Freedom, peace, agreements with yourself? Ever listen to a child talk to himself while standing in the corner? Or should I say time out chair? Personally I seem to benefit most by conversing with my peers.

Be true unto yourself, don't be taken in by the latest "ism".

Thanks to Sara for letting me visit her vast array of artist's studios. She has given me, and I'm sure many other artists, a lovely gift... hard evidence of magnificently diverse creative processes. What an inspiration this is! Thank you.

I have loved Don Miguel Ruiz for years. Now if you want something really great try Love Your Self by Lawrence Crane. I have seen an improvement in my painting.

Your remark about brokenness, psychiatry and painting reminded me of a wonderful book I'm reading. It is SO emotionally resonant and on point (regarding childhood, psychiatry AND creativity/painting) that it is best read slowly.

An Absorbing Errand: How Artists and Craftsmen Make Their Way to Mastery by Janna Malamud

I can empathize with Don Ruiz! He must be a very sensitive person who tends to drown in others' troubled waters. It can be debilitating and render you unhelpful to the person as far as advice or support. And when he says "absolve yourself" he must be including the guilt one feels about the other person's difficulties, and maybe your lack of difficulty (at the moment), sort of like survivor's guilt. This might be a good time to mention narcissists who will drag you right out like an undertow. So having perspective with empathy is important!

As our world grows more stupid, and our people become more enamored with the violence that pervades our culture, we need more than ever to hear these tender, gentle thoughts. Thank you.

You forgot "detachment". If I am too busy fixing your stuff, my stuff suffers, and ultimately, so does yours.

Empathy? There are some among us who have spent serious time IN that ocean Robert. Swallowing the sea water, stung by jellyfish, wrestling with the sharks, before being pulled onto a rescue raft, at the last minute, gasping for life-giving air. We are lucky if a beloved teacher or mentor is the rescuer who allow us precious time for wounds to heal and our spirit to revive, before pushing us back out onto the ocean (or canvas?) again! Sink or swim – no life-jackets allowed! And next time the raft is further away…

Love your letters Robert! Thank you so much for the signed book. I love it and have passed it onto an artist friend !

In my work one can very easily take on the burdens of others, and the healing comes from seeing beyond the misery of the one calling and lifting the thought above the picture into the light. There the burden rests with Truth, which takes care of all things gracefully. But as simple and as natural as that sounds, it is easy to take on a personal sense of responsibility if one isn't careful. Then one struggles for healing.

This was just beautiful and just what I needed today, so wanted to take a moment to say thank you. I am a writing teacher. Just yesterday, a group of students in my classroom discovered, after 16 weeks of exploration, that creativity was missing from their lives, they were sitting in classrooms filled with anti-learning lectures and topics, and they needed to change their course to follow their dreams - to create their own lives. I will forward this to them.

If every human is an artist of sorts, every human needs a guiding principle in the art of life. That would be beauty rather than ugliness, and kindness and empathy toward others rather than hostility and violence. We need to phase violence out of all our media. It serves little and ruins much.

Don Miguel Ruiz's book is called the FOUR Agreements, not five. I wonder what book you were actually reading?

In the "Five agreements"
"(1)Be impeccable in your word. (2)Don't take anything personally. (3)Don't make assumptions. (4)Always do your best. (5)Be skeptical, but learn to listen." I'm good with 1, 4 and 5. I have issues with the "anything" part in (2) -- absolutes are gnarly. If someone goes out of their way to make your life miserable, it's necessary to take it personally--otherwise you can be left smiling helplessly as they do unkind things (it allows for conditions that state: bullys are nice people, too, so don't get upset if they pick on you). (3) is kind of silly as even the agreements are based in a set of assumptions. Maybe both (2) and (3) don't quite express what the author really intends. I like your list much better, even if it is longer.

Your Agreements and Artists' Studios are among the best of your terrific emails. Thank you, C. Rosenberg, Sanibel FL

How appropriate to bring up "empathy" at such a time. Along with our president, all America is in tears.

Especially now with America reeling after the murders of children in CT, how does one not "take that personally" if you are a parent grieving for an innocent child lost? I didn't realize in posting my comment the night before how chilling that would be.
Such a tragedy illustrates my point ... critical viewpoint and philosophy is deeply personal and cannot be flippantly tossed off in a universal philosophy that encompasses all experience.
Our art and our life experience is so entertwined I don't see how anyone separates the two ... it is life. As artists we simply express it differently.
Newtown, CT, those parents, educators, the children who survived ... their lives will forever be defined by that event regardless if any of them ever become artists. Mr. Ruis' "agreements" seem narrow and trivial in perspective.

Always your letters are wonderful. This last one is beautiful and the real message should be read by all. Thank you!

I grew up in a hunting family when game and fish were plentiful. Gun safety was paramount and taught in the community. Rules about safety, use and care were part of our pride and cultural upbringing. Even so, I recall four episodes and a tragedy related to guns in my home. A loaded pistol found by my 3 year old son in grandpa's drawer. A bullet that landed in a drawer behind my back after a misfire in my brother's room, a misfire in my grandmother's house as my dad was showing the family a new rifle, and a hearty healthy cousin who lived his life paralyzed from a hunting accident. Guns really have no purpose but to harm, whether it's a can on the fence, a deer the family will honor by eating, or an intruder. That was then, now it's the disturbed and antisocial with their own agendas driving the debate.

Did he write those in the days before drug gangs took over many Mexican towns? Sorry, but it is hard to take such sweeping generalities seriously...not to have empathy? it is like advice from an ostrich. Too harsh?

Humans are not going to lay aside their weapons anytime soon. Or ever. That's just wishful thinking of the most pernicious sort. If that school principal had had access to a gun and been trained to use it, all those kids would still be alive. "If you would have peace, prepare for war." It's just human reality. It's not going to change. Sadly.

Hi Robert, Thank you for a year of stimulating and invigorating and reflective and resonant emails. Each one lands with the appropriate motivations and insights (for me) coincidently.
Where ever you suss your material,it seems we are all the same more or less.
Please accept my deepest sympathy for the attack on our children, what goes on in families is beyond me.
Wishing you good Christmas and excellent 2013

Although it is true that the gun issue is huge, and not only in the US of A, I personally believe that mental health issues are far more prevalent and important. I am amazed that there is not more being said about this. Can it not be true that the bullets killed those unfortunates but the mental state of the shooter pulled the trigger? Maybe we all just don't like to admit we have serious issues with the health of our nations.